Journal Archives
(My first IC journal entries will dive into Aililth's past to offer some insight on her background. They will not be posted in chronological order, however, they will tagged “past” or “present.” This particular journal is void of any dates and is no longer being updated. )
The first journal was a present from her mother, undoubtedly an attempt to offer Aililth an outlet for her thoughts. Aililth's old journal is beautifully crafted with hand sewn details of grey linen binding thread, a suede leather tie chord, and a driftwood tie key. The paper is thicker than that of a typical journal. It contains her thoughts and study notes. There are pressed flowers and herbs next to alchemist notes. The scent of jasmine, though faded by time, can still be recognized. |
Trapped. Emotional. Fiery.
Past
A young Aililth furiously paced the floor of her bedroom, her face turned more scarlet by the second as she attempted to extinguish the fire that raged within.
Trapped.
Emotional.
Fiery.
She needed to be freed from her prison. Her father was crushing her spirit to advance his own personal social status. Aililth wasn't his daughter, she was a commodity, one he is more than willing to trade to secure the extravagant life style he had grown accustomed to.
She would find a way to escape...by any means necessary.
Journal Entry
My father has locked me in my room again. This time there is a guard stationed outside my bedroom door and another beneath my balcony. If he thinks he can keep me here until I agree to marry William, he has another thing coming! It will be a cold day in hell before I am gifted away to a man I do not love! Why won't he listen to me? Why doesn't he care about how I feel?
I can hear my parents arguing downstairs. My mother is pleading with him. I can only make out bits and pieces of the conversation but it doesn't matter. I know my father won't change his mind. This is my life to live, not his. Who the hell does he think he is!? Mother will not be able to reason with him. I didn't want it to be this way but I have no choice.
This isn't my home. It's a prison. Tonight I escape and start living my life.
Hot tears ran down her face, down onto the journal page and marked it. She put the quill down next to her journal, leaving it open so the ink would dry completely.
Aililth walked over to her bed and pulled a small chest from underneath it. It contained her most guarded secret. A small leather bound book on potion making and various ingredients she collected on many forbidden adventures. Adventures that caused her father to put guards outside to keep her from running away.
Determined, Ail flipped through the pages until she reached the poison section. Quickly, she scanned the page until she found the ingredients for the potion to immobilize. A plan formed in her mind. Aililth would ask the guard to have tea made and then politely invite him to share a cup with her. If the man declined her offer, well he wouldn't....but if he did there were ways to persuade him. Her lips curled into a knowing smile as she started to grind emetic russula and water hyacinth.
That night she escaped.
A young Aililth furiously paced the floor of her bedroom, her face turned more scarlet by the second as she attempted to extinguish the fire that raged within.
Trapped.
Emotional.
Fiery.
She needed to be freed from her prison. Her father was crushing her spirit to advance his own personal social status. Aililth wasn't his daughter, she was a commodity, one he is more than willing to trade to secure the extravagant life style he had grown accustomed to.
She would find a way to escape...by any means necessary.
Journal Entry
My father has locked me in my room again. This time there is a guard stationed outside my bedroom door and another beneath my balcony. If he thinks he can keep me here until I agree to marry William, he has another thing coming! It will be a cold day in hell before I am gifted away to a man I do not love! Why won't he listen to me? Why doesn't he care about how I feel?
I can hear my parents arguing downstairs. My mother is pleading with him. I can only make out bits and pieces of the conversation but it doesn't matter. I know my father won't change his mind. This is my life to live, not his. Who the hell does he think he is!? Mother will not be able to reason with him. I didn't want it to be this way but I have no choice.
This isn't my home. It's a prison. Tonight I escape and start living my life.
Hot tears ran down her face, down onto the journal page and marked it. She put the quill down next to her journal, leaving it open so the ink would dry completely.
Aililth walked over to her bed and pulled a small chest from underneath it. It contained her most guarded secret. A small leather bound book on potion making and various ingredients she collected on many forbidden adventures. Adventures that caused her father to put guards outside to keep her from running away.
Determined, Ail flipped through the pages until she reached the poison section. Quickly, she scanned the page until she found the ingredients for the potion to immobilize. A plan formed in her mind. Aililth would ask the guard to have tea made and then politely invite him to share a cup with her. If the man declined her offer, well he wouldn't....but if he did there were ways to persuade him. Her lips curled into a knowing smile as she started to grind emetic russula and water hyacinth.
That night she escaped.
Asha
Present
Aililth wandered around aimlessly for hours collecting specimen for her alchemy training as instructed by Minalan. Each time Ail picked one plant, she would detect another nearby. This seemingly endless cycle resulted in a full pack of assorted plants but also in the young woman becoming lost.
The student looked up, judging the position of the sun, she knew the hour grew late. Ail was in the process of trying figure out her current location when she heard the heartbreaking cry of a young feline. Deciding to investigate, she headed towards the sound of the distress call.
It didn't take long to make the gruesome discovery. A malnourished cub was laying next to a mutilated lioness. Flies buzzed around what was left of the lifeless body, the smell of blood prevalent. Ail grimaced at sight. The unfortunate situation triggered a childhood memory best forgotten.
Past
A young Aililth played on the grounds when she happened upon a nest of four bunnies. Excited, she ran to tell her mother. Moments later the young child pulled her mother, Elizabeth, by the hand towards the rabbit nest.
“Look mama, look!” The child's eyes danced with excitement.
Elizabeth discovered that only one of the bunnies remained alive. Ail begged her mother to keep the bunny.
“We'll have to ask your father honey.”
Present
“Cycle of life,” Aililth snorted, “more like murder.” Aililth never forgave her father for that act of cruelty. Even though her temper flared at the memory, she gently scooped up the cub. “Not this time, you will be safe with me.”
Journal Entry
I wasn't expecting to find a motherless cub today while gathering ingredients for potion making. She is severely underweight and probably hasn't ate since her mother died. It's a miracle she survived this long alone in the wild. I just couldn't bring myself to leave her out there to die. I've decided to name her Asha, it means hope. I wonder what Min will think of her.
Aililth wandered around aimlessly for hours collecting specimen for her alchemy training as instructed by Minalan. Each time Ail picked one plant, she would detect another nearby. This seemingly endless cycle resulted in a full pack of assorted plants but also in the young woman becoming lost.
The student looked up, judging the position of the sun, she knew the hour grew late. Ail was in the process of trying figure out her current location when she heard the heartbreaking cry of a young feline. Deciding to investigate, she headed towards the sound of the distress call.
It didn't take long to make the gruesome discovery. A malnourished cub was laying next to a mutilated lioness. Flies buzzed around what was left of the lifeless body, the smell of blood prevalent. Ail grimaced at sight. The unfortunate situation triggered a childhood memory best forgotten.
Past
A young Aililth played on the grounds when she happened upon a nest of four bunnies. Excited, she ran to tell her mother. Moments later the young child pulled her mother, Elizabeth, by the hand towards the rabbit nest.
“Look mama, look!” The child's eyes danced with excitement.
Elizabeth discovered that only one of the bunnies remained alive. Ail begged her mother to keep the bunny.
“We'll have to ask your father honey.”
Present
“Cycle of life,” Aililth snorted, “more like murder.” Aililth never forgave her father for that act of cruelty. Even though her temper flared at the memory, she gently scooped up the cub. “Not this time, you will be safe with me.”
Journal Entry
I wasn't expecting to find a motherless cub today while gathering ingredients for potion making. She is severely underweight and probably hasn't ate since her mother died. It's a miracle she survived this long alone in the wild. I just couldn't bring myself to leave her out there to die. I've decided to name her Asha, it means hope. I wonder what Min will think of her.
Adventurous Asha
Present
Aililth smiled as she quietly followed Asha through the rugged terrain of Shadowfen. Ail knew of the grave dangers in the area, so she kept her eyes and ears open. Asha, on the other hand, was busy pouncing on every tiny insect she encountered. Although Asha was proving to be a capable hunter, she still needed somebody to look out for her. Aililth refused to control Asha out of fear but she would still protect her. The two had a strong bond already.
Past
A child of nine years sulked in her bedroom. No longer was she allowed outside to freely explore or play with other children. It was her father's newest rule.
“Why am I being punished?!” Aililth's voice boomed angrily, “it was just a silly game!” She quieted down when she heard her parents start to argue downstairs. It was about her...again.
Brantley had caught his only daughter pretending to marry a local farm boy. He was livid.
“My daughter will not consort with those of a lower class, I forbid it!” Brantley looked at his wife, as if he expected her to agree with him.
“Brantley, she is still but a child and it was only a game. Please...”
He quickly cut her off. “I forbid it!” Then he promptly stormed out of the room.
The child retreated to her bed where she grabbed her pillow and screamed into it.
Present
Journal Entry
I am so excited! I discovered a flora species that appears to be uncatalogued! I'm currently trying to identify it. Under Minalan's instruction, I will attempt to see what properties it has. Asha also helped me gather insect parts while we explored Shadowfen. She is quiet the brave helper!
Under the entry is a small sketch of the plant.
Breakdown, Break Free
Past
Brantley's men had to drag William off of Aililth's motionless body. Surprisingly, it took all of them to subdue the crazed man. Ail was badly beaten and bloody. She had survived, but at what cost?
Her father hired skilled healers to tend to his daughter's wounds throughout the next weeks. They focused on healing Ail's body. Aililth's face, neck, and arms were heavily bruised with random slice marks scattered from head to toe. Those wounds were all superficial, however, the stab wound near her heart would leave a permanent scar. Ail was lucky to be alive.
Guilt consumed Aililth. She knew she was partly to blame for Will's breakdown. Tears flowed daily as depression plagued her. Memories came to Aililth in nightmare form, on those nights she failed to rest. The young woman struggled to move forward with her life. Her weight dropped severely.
Elizabeth watched helplessly as her daughter's fire dimmed. It was then she sent men to Ail's estate in search of Asha. Elizabeth hoped the trusted feline would help Aililth break free of whatever still had a hold on her daughter.
Her mother's efforts paid off, for the first time in months, Ail smiled as Asha nuzzled against her leg.
Present
months later
Journal Entry
Asha and I are ready to leave my parents' house! I've packed my belongings and we're traveling out to see the Island of Dreams! I'm still questioning if I can trust the guards my father insisted on sending with us... but for now I'll allow it until I hire my own personal guard. I just want out of this house right now!
**After her two week getaway, Aililth relocates for a fresh start. She purchases a new home in Westport.**
Brantley's men had to drag William off of Aililth's motionless body. Surprisingly, it took all of them to subdue the crazed man. Ail was badly beaten and bloody. She had survived, but at what cost?
Her father hired skilled healers to tend to his daughter's wounds throughout the next weeks. They focused on healing Ail's body. Aililth's face, neck, and arms were heavily bruised with random slice marks scattered from head to toe. Those wounds were all superficial, however, the stab wound near her heart would leave a permanent scar. Ail was lucky to be alive.
Guilt consumed Aililth. She knew she was partly to blame for Will's breakdown. Tears flowed daily as depression plagued her. Memories came to Aililth in nightmare form, on those nights she failed to rest. The young woman struggled to move forward with her life. Her weight dropped severely.
Elizabeth watched helplessly as her daughter's fire dimmed. It was then she sent men to Ail's estate in search of Asha. Elizabeth hoped the trusted feline would help Aililth break free of whatever still had a hold on her daughter.
Her mother's efforts paid off, for the first time in months, Ail smiled as Asha nuzzled against her leg.
Present
months later
Journal Entry
Asha and I are ready to leave my parents' house! I've packed my belongings and we're traveling out to see the Island of Dreams! I'm still questioning if I can trust the guards my father insisted on sending with us... but for now I'll allow it until I hire my own personal guard. I just want out of this house right now!
**After her two week getaway, Aililth relocates for a fresh start. She purchases a new home in Westport.**
Meeting Yaami
Past
Aililth followed an Argonian merchant onto a docked ship. “The adder is over here,” the scaled male said as he motioned for her to follow him. She wanted to purchase this particular snake so she could milk it's venom for her specially brewed poisons.
Ail smiled as she drew closer, her eyes focused on the sep adder. The Argonian was surprised to see the adder made no attempt to try to strike in Aililth's direction as it had with all previous potential customers.
“Is it tame?” Aililth inquired, as the caged adder slithered closer to her, it still showed no signs of aggression.
The Argonian hesitated, “I am not sure,” he lied. The merchant needed the coin desperately so he quickly offered, “I will sell it to you at a fair price.”
The two agreed to a deal and not long after Aililth welcomed the adder to her new home, The Crystal Serpent. In addition to providing a valuable resource to Aililth, Yaami also protects The Crystal Serpent from thieves.
Present
days later
Journal Entry
I had to devise a magical cage using crystals to keep Yaami secured. I can't have her escaping and scaring off my customers! On a positive note, Yaami seems more comfortable being handled and I accumulated a sufficient supply of venom to begin working on my next batch of experimental potions. I wonder if I should take her to my next class and demonstrate the proper way to milk a snake?
Aililth followed an Argonian merchant onto a docked ship. “The adder is over here,” the scaled male said as he motioned for her to follow him. She wanted to purchase this particular snake so she could milk it's venom for her specially brewed poisons.
Ail smiled as she drew closer, her eyes focused on the sep adder. The Argonian was surprised to see the adder made no attempt to try to strike in Aililth's direction as it had with all previous potential customers.
“Is it tame?” Aililth inquired, as the caged adder slithered closer to her, it still showed no signs of aggression.
The Argonian hesitated, “I am not sure,” he lied. The merchant needed the coin desperately so he quickly offered, “I will sell it to you at a fair price.”
The two agreed to a deal and not long after Aililth welcomed the adder to her new home, The Crystal Serpent. In addition to providing a valuable resource to Aililth, Yaami also protects The Crystal Serpent from thieves.
Present
days later
Journal Entry
I had to devise a magical cage using crystals to keep Yaami secured. I can't have her escaping and scaring off my customers! On a positive note, Yaami seems more comfortable being handled and I accumulated a sufficient supply of venom to begin working on my next batch of experimental potions. I wonder if I should take her to my next class and demonstrate the proper way to milk a snake?
Final Entry
Until a few months ago, Aililth meticulously kept a journal sharing her everyday life. From personal thoughts and feelings to her own adventures and experiences – it was all neatly recorded then tucked safely away from prying eyes. It was something she started as a lonely child to cope with her father's sheltering ways.
Her habitual recordings ceased the day she was kidnapped by Charles. Even after losing both of her parents, she did not find solace in her writing. Actually, it was quite the opposite. Lady Winmar was terrified to record her thoughts and feelings concerning recent tragedies and horrors.
Periodically, Aililth would pick up a quill and hold it near her journal paper to write. The words have yet to flow as they once did. Instead, they mostly remain trapped in her head where they prevent her tortured mind from healing fully. Still, her attempts are becoming more frequent.
Journal Entry
Most of the words are scratched out and not legible. Only a few words are barely recognizable.
Blood. Die. Volund.
Her habitual recordings ceased the day she was kidnapped by Charles. Even after losing both of her parents, she did not find solace in her writing. Actually, it was quite the opposite. Lady Winmar was terrified to record her thoughts and feelings concerning recent tragedies and horrors.
Periodically, Aililth would pick up a quill and hold it near her journal paper to write. The words have yet to flow as they once did. Instead, they mostly remain trapped in her head where they prevent her tortured mind from healing fully. Still, her attempts are becoming more frequent.
Journal Entry
Most of the words are scratched out and not legible. Only a few words are barely recognizable.
Blood. Die. Volund.
((This journal covers slightly more than a year of gameplay for the character Aililth Winmar. A majority of this information is undisclosed to the general public. ICly, Aililth's father kept William's attack quiet to protect the family's reputation. The traumatic experience isn't something Aililth openly speaks on. Charles' kidnapping of Aililth was made known to the public via rumor mill posts. It's quiet possible a character heard of the abduction if they visited a tavern based in Cyrodill or DC lands. The player of Volund would know most the contents of this journal - as Volund read it when Aililth went missing. He would not have seen the "Final Entry." Honestly, I was new to ESO when I started this journal and I think it's reflected in the above entries. Moving forward readers will see a noticeable difference in future journal entries.))